First off, why this post? Being aware of things is the first step to becoming a better person. It’s important to be able to pick out and categorize things to make life easier and much better understood. This idea applies to what people say.
There’s a cool thing I experienced when I started my adventure into finding myself. I wanted to be smarter and successful. Here are the brief points regarding people:
- I can learn fastest from those who are smarter and successful in what they do
- I can also learn from those who are getting started with their ambitions
- I can work with those who are on the same level and mission as myself
- I can also learn from those who aren’t chasing anything today
In other words, I can learn from anyone (and so can you). Being able to put people in different buckets gave me ideas on where to steer conversations that not only helped myself, but also the other person.
Here’s the thing: Everyone is going to give you their two cents.
Thoughts, opinions, ideas, etc. on what you should do, how you should do it, and what you should avoid. This is great. It’s a kind gesture. My problem is most people won’t understand you one bit.
Why can’t they understand you? Aside from the complexity of thoughts/dreams/goals and emotions, circumstances will always be different (past and present).
You have deep, dark secrets that no one has ever seen or have ever lived. They might be able to relate, but they can never truly understand.
When they say, or rather tell you things about your plans, they don’t have the full picture and can only voice their opinion based on the brief amount of information you gave them + their own experience.
My biggest problem is when people voice their own experience, when they have no experience at all.
I want to share this awareness with you, and remind myself, too. The natural tendency people have when they hear your plans are never really positive, and can influence you in the wrongest way possible. Ever watch the movie Inception?
Here is what I mostly hear from others:
- They push you down, like “You’re going to lose everything”
- Dictate how I do things, like “You should do X instead with me”
- Are worrisome thoughts, like “Just be careful”
I believe people are inherently good, so this is all said with good intention.
As social creatures we have always relied on the knowledge, experience, and insights from others since dawn of time. We need each other and want each other to be safe since curiosity of “what’s in the bush” could lead to an absolute end outcome (crippled or killed).
The Big BUTT: Life is different today. There is no tiger in the bush.
If you have the resources + the desire to do + a plan that take into account the risks/benefits/etc., you can stop fucking around and let your instincts and desires drive you.
Why this post? I’ve always been split on sharing what I am up to with others.
On one hand, sure I get to hear their thoughts and insights on what I am doing or plan to do. On the other hand, most people know 0 about what I’m trying to do.
I can listen and be open minded about your thoughts, but for the most part, it can be ignored. I have done my research and know what I need to do. As for what can happen (those black swans moments), I can figure it out.
So what’s your takeaway? Fuck everyone.
If you find yourself being influenced in the wrongest way, like having your plans changed because of the emotional voices whispering in your ears, stop talking about your plans. Where does fear come from? Did it actually come from you?
Sometimes you have to do things yourself and make shit happen.
There will always be a million and one reasons for something to fail. But you, and myself, will do it all because of the one reason you can success. The “how” doesn’t matter.